06/24/2022
I don’t even have a joke. I’m screaming, this is a nightmare, f**k Susan Collins into the f**king Crab Nebula.
Today’s Moment of Science… fetal bu****it.
If you wander around the internet for a few hot minutes you’re gonna find a lot of opinions and very few facts about abortion. So we’re just gonna rapid fire sort through this, because I haven’t an iota of a f**k left to give.
Well, I have one left to give: f**k Susan Collins.
Anyway.
Myth: Most women regret abortions.
Reality: A 2018 study supported that the most typical emotional response to an abortion is relief. Only about 6% of patients had mainly negative emotions about the procedure. The vast majority of patients’ did not experience a change of heart about their choice five years out.
Myth: Didn’t Roe (of Roe v. Wade) regret her decision though?
Reality: Nope on two fronts- she didn't get an abortion and she never really became pro-life. A few years ago before her death in 2017, Jane Roe, aka Norma McCorvey, confessed that the pro-life movement threw a small pile of cash at her to publicly bat for their side.
Myth: The pro-life movement has always been a thing.
Reality: Ronald Reagan signed one of the most liberal abortion laws in the country as governor of California in 1967, six years before Roe. Republicans and religious organizations we most commonly think of as abortion opponents saw its legality as providing safe medical care for women. There are quotes in support of abortion from Baptist groups from that era will blow your goddamn mind.
Some Catholic anti-abortion groups had already formed in the sixties. Then through the seventies, the pro-life movement gained steam. The broad coalition of the ‘New Right’ started coming together in large part around propaganda about protecting fetuses.
Myth: Abortion causes breast cancer.
Reality: There is no science to back this up. This isn’t my conclusion, this is the conclusion of three major medical organizations: the National Cancer Institute, the American Cancer Society, and the American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists. An examination of more than thirty studies by the organizations supported this conclusion.
Myth: Most abortions happen after a baby is a whole viable human.
Reality: 91% of abortions happen in the first trimester when you’d be hard pressed to look at it and differentiate it from a fish fetus. The majority of clinics do not provide late term abortions, and the procedure has different limitations state by state at various points in pregnancy. Virtually without exception, late term abortions are due to the types of health issues that leave pregnant women devastated over a baby that was very much wanted.
Myth: IUDs cause abortions.
Reality: IUDs work by a few different mechanisms of action, one of which involves stopping a fertilized egg from implanting. Pregnancy begins after an egg implants. If you don’t believe me, ask all the people who have been through heartbreaking rounds of IVF and have had fertilized eggs deposited that didn’t implant. They were not pregnant for the few weeks between deposit and negative pregnancy test; they were simply never pregnant. Which is understandable because about half of fertilized eggs just naturally fail to implant.
If God exists, and this is the standard for abortion, God’s one hell of an abortionist.
Myth: The morning after pill causes an abortion.
Reality: The morning after pill is like a megadose of the birth control pill. It’s recommended to be taken within 72 hours of unprotected s*x or birth control failure. Much like an IUD, it can prevent implantation. It can also prevent ovulation. It can’t be an abortifacient because nobody’s pregnant within three days of an “I meant to pull out but then I thought of Helen Mirren.”
Myth: Abortions have extremely high rates of complications.
Reality: Yeah, back alley ones with coat hangers and vacuums and giant doses of random herbs tend to be messy. But Americans from 1973 until, give or take, last week? One of those ‘safe and legal’ procedures gives less than a 0.3% risk of complications that require hospitalization.
The fatality rate of all abortions in the US from 1998 to 2010 is 0.0007%. By comparison, complications from pregnancy in the US have a 0.017% fatality rate.
It’s almost like they’re not pro-life.
Myth: Jesus and the Bible say abortion is a one-way ticket to hell.
Reality: The word abortion isn’t in the Bible, and it’s definitely not in the super-Jesusy chapters. The Bible is kinda ‘eh’ on children as a whole. Hosea 9:14 says “give them a miscarrying womb.” Isaiah 13:18 preaches ‘They shall have no pity on the fruit of the womb; their eyes shall not spare children.” Numbers 31:17 espouses “Now therefore k!ll every m@le among the little ones.” Which I censored partially because, Jesus Christ, the bible is gonna get me put on a watch list.
There is a surefire strategy to reduce abortions if that’s a thing people actually care about: teach comprehensive s*x ed and make access to birth control convenient and affordable. But somehow, almost every pro-life organization is against s*x ed and against birth control.
So pardon me if I find this alleged deep concern for fetuses to be unadulterated bu****it.
This has been your Moment of Science, warning you that they’re coming for birth control and gay marriage next.
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Sources for your next internet argument:
Women do not regret abortions: https://www.cnn.com/2020/01/12/health/women-abortion-emotion-study/index.html
https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0277953619306999
Abortions don’t cause breast cancer:
https://www.plannedparenthood.org/uploads/filer_public/af/1a/af1ae95f-de81-43dd-91a3-470043b06dce/myths_about_abortion_and_breast_cancer.pdf
What the bible says about abortion: https://ffrf.org/component/k2/item/26087-abortion-nontract
Abortion fatality rate: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4554338/
Abortion hospitalization rate: https://www.researchgate.net/publication/270651008_Incidence_of_Emergency_Department_Visits_and_Complications_After_Abortion
Additional info on abortion complications: https://www.cdc.gov/mmwr/volumes/68/ss/ss6811a1.htm
Unsafe (i.e. illegal) abortion data: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2709326/
Preventing unsafe abortion: https://www.who.int/news-room/fact-sheets/detail/preventing-unsafe-abortion
Jane Roe was not pro-life/origins of pro-life movement: https://www.nbcnews.com/think/opinion/fx-s-jane-roe-deathbed-confession-reveals-abortion-lie-heart-ncna1214381
Reagan legalizes abortion: https://todayinclh.com/?event=governor-reagan-signs-liberal-california-abortion-law
Barry Goldwater’s pro-choice early career: https://embryo.asu.edu/pages/barry-morris-goldwater-1909-1998
Half of fertilized eggs don’t implant: https://www.guttmacher.org/gpr/2005/05/implications-defining-when-woman-pregnant #:~:text=Between%20one%2Dthird%20and%20one,only%20after%20implantation%20is%20complete.
Fatalities due to pregnancy: https://www.commonwealthfund.org/publications/issue-brief-report/2020/dec/maternal-mortality-united-states-primer #:~:text=The%20most%20recent%20U.S.%20maternal,after%20the%20day%20of%20birth.
History of the pro-life movement: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/United_States_anti-abortion_movement
