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"I worked with jomo kenyatta for one year.One day,I accompanied mzee to mombasa aboard a Kenya Air Force plane.Before...
28/08/2024

"I worked with jomo kenyatta for one year.One day,I accompanied mzee to mombasa aboard a Kenya Air Force plane.

Before reaching the airport,we experienced some turbulence and Jomo became abit uneasy as he had some phobia with heights.

After landing,mzee called the pilot and told him in Gíkuyu "wee mwanake,kuma ùmùthì ùrìkuwaga nyùkwa!!".We went back to nairobi via the road!" 😂 😂

Lee Njiru ☺

A woman was at home when she heard someone knocking at her door.She goes to the door opens it and sees a man standing th...
07/08/2024

A woman was at home when she heard someone knocking at her door.
She goes to the door opens it and sees a man standing there.
He asks the lady, "Do you have a Vagīna?"
She slams the door in disgust.
The next morning she heard a knock at the door, its the same man and he asks the same question to the woman, "Do you have a Vagīna?"
She slams the door again.
Later that night when her husband got home she told him what has happened the last two days.
The husband tells his wife in a loving and calm voice, "Honey, I am taking an off tomorrow so as to be home, just incase this guy shows up again."
The next morning they heard a knock at the door and both ran for the door.
The husband whisperes to the wife, "Honey, im going to hīde behind the door and listen and if it is the same guy I want you to answer yes to the
question because I want to see where he's going with this."
She nods yes to her husband and opens the door.
Sure enough the same fellow is standing there, he asks, "Do you have a Vagīna?"
"Yes I do." says the lady.
The man replies, "Good, would you mind telling your husband to leave my wife's Vagīna and start using yours!!.

Mi kuenda Kwa sponsor sitawai wacha☝️🙄coz unaendanga huko one nyt stand😉👀unapata kamoja🍆🍑kamissionary ka one minute 🍆💦un...
06/06/2024

Mi kuenda Kwa sponsor sitawai wacha☝️🙄coz unaendanga huko one nyt stand😉👀unapata kamoja🍆🍑kamissionary ka one minute 🍆💦unaoga na shower🚿alafu unajengwa 10k ya fate😋😋 na una dropiwa home☝️...my frend enda Kwa boychild,anakunyandua nyandu nyandu Ile mathogothanio Kwanza😌(very violent) mpaka trachea inaguzana na rough endoplasmic reticulum alafu bronchioles na diastema zinatwist pale Kwa patelo😌🙄mpaka unashindwa kubreath😑😑 later anakupea ksh237 ya fare😣,kutoka nje nayo uende home unapata plot mzima wamefua nguo kutoka Kwa nyumba mpaka Kwa gate unaenda umeinama ni k**a umetoka Kwa mganga ANTO wa chukaANTO wa chuka

kumbe mlevi akiuza shamba msichana wa wine &spirit anaeza ru...
31/05/2024

kumbe mlevi akiuza shamba msichana wa
wine &spirit
anaeza ruhusu uingie kwa
counter na ujiuzie,

Nilienda kinyozi jana nimecheka karibu nifukuzwe🤣🤣🤣🤣Kidogo kidogo kukaingia mrembo fulani na alikua na figure plus sura...
31/05/2024

Nilienda kinyozi jana nimecheka karibu nifukuzwe🤣🤣🤣🤣
Kidogo kidogo kukaingia mrembo fulani na alikua na figure plus sura kuweza😋😋😋 aisee hio ilikua figure na sura zilikua zimeenda kidato😜😜😜 sasa mzee fulani kipara alikua ananyolewa zile nywele zinakuaga kando ya kipara nikaskia amesema🤣🤣🤣🤣
Mzee kipara: Wow!! Madam unakaa mrembo sana😋😋
Mrembo: Asante🙂🙂
Mzee kipara: Unatoka wapi hii kenya yetu??🤔🤔
Mrembo: Naishi hukutu karibu na center 🙂🙂🙂
Mzee kipara: Naweza kupeleka out siku moja🤔🤔
Mrembo akanua mkono juu kuonyesha mzee kipara pete ndio ajue yeye ameolewa lakini kabla amalize kuinua mkono mzee kipara akamwambia🤫🤫🤫🤫
Mzee kipara: Ata mimi niko na bibi lakini nataka tukutane tukule mali polepole😋😋
Mrembo: Nitaambia bwanangu naenda wapi hio siku?🤔🤔🤔
Mzee kipara: Utamwambia umeenda injiri ndio neno lifikie walio mbali na kanisa lenu🤣🤣🤣🤣
Mrembo: Ebu mwambie hivo wewe mwenyewe🤣🤣🤣🤣
Mzee kipara: Tutapatana wapi na hio nugu yako niiambie hivo🤣🤣🤣
Mrembo: Hayuko mbali ndio huyo anakunyoa🤣🤣🤣🤣
Mzee kipara: Unajua nakuaga mwenda wazimu usibebe maneno yangu serious 😭😭😭😭😂😂🤣🤣
ANTO wa chukaANTO wa chuka

My wife's mother visited us. We were all in the sitting room chatting. My wife felt like having s*x but couldn't tell me...
20/05/2024

My wife's mother visited us. We were all in the sitting room chatting. My wife felt like having s*x but couldn't tell me directly so she stood up and pretended she had developed a terrible headache. She went to the bedroom and I followed her shortly. We had s*x and when I came back to the sitting room, I forgot to zip up. In the sitting room;
Mother in law: "How is she now?"
Me: "I've given her Panado. She is now sleeping.😴
Mother in law: "That's good my son, now please *CLOSE THE PHARMACY."* 🙆🏾‍♂️😂😂 ANTO ANTO wa chukaow for more good stories

Leo nikiwa natoka job (ile ya kawaida tu🦺⛑️)😂 niliamua kwamba hii 40 Niko nayo, acha nipite hotelini atleast nikunywe c...
16/05/2024

Leo nikiwa natoka job (ile ya kawaida tu🦺⛑️)😂 niliamua kwamba hii 40 Niko nayo, acha nipite hotelini atleast nikunywe chai vikombe 2. kikombe moja for 1 good hour😂 na ingine 1hour😂 alafu nisugue meno na toothpick for 30 mins😂, nijisearch mifuko 10mins kutafta doo😂, ninawe 10mins🙆, nifake call 10mins😂 ndo atleast nitumie WIFI kiasi😂(sema akili).

Kufika kwa mlango, niliuliza "🗣️🎤password ya WiFi ni gani?" Dem mmoja akaniambia "kula kwanza" 😥 then nikasema " niletee chai basi 🙆" hiyo Dem akaniletea chai nikamuuliza tena " ulisema password ya WiFi ni gani? tena akaniambia "kula kwanza😥"

After nimemaliza kikombe cha kwanza, nikaitisha ingine 🔥 yule yule tena akaniletea. kumuuliza password alinijibu "kula kwanza" 😥 eweeeeh kumaliza ya pili nikamuuliza password tena akamwambia kula kwanza 😥..... Nilijam nikamwekelea teke Moja knockout ya mudwi akafeint😂😂😂😂

Saii Niko huku police station 😥 nimesearchiwa na wakachukua Ile 40 bob😭 then naskia password ilikuwa ni "kulakwanza" in small letters🙆 wanangoja huyo waitress afeintuke aone venye napigwa follow my page for more stories ANTO wa chukaANTO wa chuka

KHALIGRAPH JONESFrom Scoring a D+ in School to Minting Millions the Little Known StorY Brian Robert Ouko, widely known a...
16/05/2024

KHALIGRAPH JONES

From Scoring a D+ in School to Minting Millions the Little Known StorY

Brian Robert Ouko, widely known as Khaligraph Jones, Papa Jones, or the OG, stands as one of Kenya's most accomplished and revered rap artists. His distinctive rawness, assertive persona, and remarkable lyricism have positioned him as a standout figure in the Kenyan Hip-Hop scene, earning him recognition as a face of the genre in the country.

Despite the acclaim he enjoys today, Khaligraph's journey to success has been marked by challenges, and he started from rock bottom. This article sheds light on Khaligraph Jones' remarkable journey to becoming one of Africa's best rappers:

Khaligraph Jones' Early Life and Education

Born on June 12, 1990, in Kayole, a Nairobi informal settlement, Khaligraph faced early life challenges. Limited details are available about his formative years, but he revealed in an interview that financial constraints affected his high school journey, resulting in him scoring a D+ in his KCSE exams.

Khaligraph Music Debut

Khaligraph's foray into music began during high school. In Form Three, he performed at various events, earning up to Sh15,000 per show. Post-high school, he worked as a club bouncer, earning Sh500 per night. However, a job dispute led to his exit, propelling him to fully embrace his music dream. His participation in the 2009 Channel O MC Africa Challenge marked a significant milestone, paving the way for his entry into Kenya's mainstream music industry.

Khaligraph Jones' Major Breakthrough

The turning point in Khaligraph's career came in 2013 with the release of "YEGO," a song dedicated to Kenyan javelin champion Julius Yego. The track resonated widely, catapulting Khaligraph to national fame. Subsequent releases like "Mazishi, which went Viral also which was his Catalytic converter to his Prowess in Music Industry..

Kaligraph Jones is A Kenyan House hold name
And internationally Icon..

Never give up in life
ANTO wa chuka

LET'S LAUGH TOGETHER ♥️🤣💯A JSS INTERN teacher went to a restaurant with just 200/= to eat after the entire Day of Demons...
15/05/2024

LET'S LAUGH TOGETHER ♥️🤣💯

A JSS INTERN teacher went to a restaurant with just 200/= to eat after the entire Day of Demonstrations. So he ordered food for 100/= and roasted meat for 100/= he sat down & food was served.

A man sitting beside him, putting on a nice shirt said to him, "Sir, I love the way you are eating, you can add more food, I will pay".

He hastily added more food for 350/= as he continued eating.

He then told him again, "You eat so well, add 2 bottles of your favorite soft drinks so that you can drink after eating".

The teacher quickly made the order, after drinking 1 bottle as he was trying to open the 2nd bottle, the opener fell down and he bent over to pick it up. He was shocked to discover that the man was bare footed, then he noticed that he was a mad man.

The mad man looked at him,smiling and said, "The way they are going to beat you here today, only God will save you!"

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