17/01/2024
ADVISORS VERSES MENTORS AND ACTION
Jim Rohn is one of my best mentors who said discipline is the bridge between goals and accomplishments. He added that success is a few simple disciplines practiced every day whereas failure is a few simple errors in judgment repeated every. The Key word here is âeverydayâ. And it is better to read all the information that you are supposed to know than not know it, he further added.
Another great mentor who had profound input in my lifeâs philosophy is Father Kakuba Kapya who said an advisor points you to where you want to go which he himself has never been to, whereas a mentor takes you to where he is or has been. A billionaire who guides you on how to become a billionaire is a mentor whereas an accountant who guides you on how to become a billionaire when he himself has never been a billionaire is an advisor. And a person who got married as a virgin advising young people on how to keep their virginity and sexual purity until married is a mentor whereas a person who got married when not a virgin who advises others to be sexually pure and keep their virginity till marriage is an adviser.
Anyone can be an adviser but not anyone can be a mentor. Advice normally refers to good and beneficial piece of information. Sometimes mentors are referred to as coaches.
As per Oxford dictionary, an adviser is a person who gives advice in a particular field. And a mentor is an experienced and trusted advisor. He is experienced, meaning he experienced what he is advising you about. So, you should make it your obligation to have few advisors and many mentors.
An African proverb from Uganda goes, if a child eats only her motherâs food, she will think her mother is the best cook in the world. You are not a tree or mountain or a prisoner of your town, city and country. Move, relocate or visit other countries and cities to learn more. Travelling as I always encouraged those we crossed paths with is one of the best ways of leaning. You cannot truly know what snow is unless you touched and experienced it. There are things in life you will never learn unless you travel. Travelling is the best education.
When you travel you and meet and discover new people, things, places, ideas and experiences. From here your paths will cross with real mentors and advisors and from your experiences you end up coming with new philosophies of life. A poor child who was born and grew all his life in Agege Lagos Nigeria or in Kaduna state or in Mengo Kisenyi Kampala Uganda, will not understand when you tell him of staying for a year without power shortage, having good amenities with noise free areas and good security. So such international exposure to second or better first world countries is very vital in the formulation of someoneâs lifeâs objectives and philosophies. It will swiftly kill his or her mediocrity and scarcity mindset and propel the person to desire a good life. This exposure can also be obtained online by seeing what other people especially our mentors are doing or have. Though reading, listening and watching people enjoy serene environments is not a strong trigger than living in such environments yourself. When you do not travel you cannot easily and clearly realise how badly your environment is, your perspective is limited. In five years time you will still be the same person except for the people you meet and books you read. And our African fathers put it well, those who do not move, do not notice their chains.
Environment is key in oneâs personal development. You can change your environment today and now intellectually by changing from a fixed mindset to abundance mindset such as growth and benefit mindsets. You can change physically your environment from a toxic to a loving one; from violent, insecure and noisy neighbourhood to a serene, secure and quiet one. You can also change your work if it does not bring peace, joy and fulfilment to your life. The best is to do both a mental shift and relocate to a peaceful valuable area. Note that environment also includes the type of friends you keep around you or the people you associate with most times. No matter how good you are, if you are in a wrong environment, you are worthless. Negative energy or spirits can seriously infect and affect you, stay far away from it and them. When you live among five billionaires, you become the sixth.
Am sometimes asked by especially pre25s on Facebook, why am still not married. And to make matters worse most judge my age by the profile picture of my mentor His Highness John Pombe Magufuli. When I get such a question I first find out how they come to such conclusion. My A-Level was somehow messy, with even O-Level where sometimes I lack transport to and from school. I remember in senior four our wood work teacher Mr Ongeto Charles had to give me 10,000 Ugandan Shillings to return home with, I had no transport. Forget about pocket money, it was always not enough or not there. Worse was my degree which I struggled to finish it and I had to do menial and various jobs to pay some of my tuition and needs. I finally graduated at 29 years old with honours. Then talk about residence, as I write this we have no house in my fatherâs names, and am having debts for my masters, rent etc.
In Africa in the words of Benjamin Zulu one of the best relationship, life and psychology coaches in the world, we do not need motivational speakers in Africa. Our lives and environment are enough to motivate us to become better, seek and work for a good life. Just looking at my tribulations in paying my school fees, tuition, and rent, comparing it with children from rich families and the west, I can never sleep until I change my life. The burning desire to live a good life is burning in me. Making such comparisons in your environment with those in first world countries and making a lifeâs evaluation are vital in your growth.
Evaluating oneâs life should not be limited to material possessions and academic accolades. You can evaluate the values and virtues which you have. Are you honest, polite, just, peaceful, humble, Self-disciplined, Self-respecting, do you have self-control and so on. It is a sort of SWOT analysis about your life of what you need to change and improve; spiritually, morally, financially, physically, socially, academically and relationally.
Knowledge of self and of important survival knowledge is paramount as the Bible advised, my people perish for lack of knowledge. In this 21st century or dot com era, getting information about self and whichever topic interests you is very simple. This is why those who are illiterate today are not those who cannot read and write, but those who cannot seek knowledge, learn from it, unlearn bad knowledge and relearn new knowledge confers Alvin Toffler.
After knowing how your life situation with the examination of the above seven areas and conscience are, am sure you will know how you fair which in most cases is not very good. Armed with this knowledge and urgency, you take it upon yourself to make sure that you change your life by seeking advisers and mentors.
You must have a burning desire as Napoleon Hill stated and strong will if you really want to change your life. The questions âwhy?â and âhow?â are the best mind triggers to push you into action. Why am I or my parents not able to pay my school fees? Why are we or am I not able to easily travel the world? Why are we not living in our own house with a large compound and financially stable? Why am I not attracting valuable and virtues prospects for a relationship? Why am I having these bad habits and characters? Etc. How do I travel the world? How do we afford good housing and feeding? How can I become valuable and virtues etc? The moment you ask âhow?â instead of whining that I cannot afford something, immediately your brain goes to work to find solutions for it as Robert Kiyosaki advised.
Brain Tracy the master of step by step mentor of dreams and goal settings advised us to write everything down. Write down the evaluation of your life. Write down your dreams. Divide your dreams into goals, come up with plans on how to achieve these goals and finally develop different activities for actualising these goals. The activities should be daily, weekly, monthly and yearly. If you take care of the days and weeks, the months and years will be taken care of automatically.
Action! Someone I show online said she read about 250 books last year. I tried looking at the titles of the books but they were not clear on her photo with the books. The few which I show I did not know any. It is good to have all knowledge of a particular field, but knowledge without action is useless. Education is knowledge acted on. Or a truly educated person is one who acts on it or put it into use. Life if full of opportunities, but if you do not act on them, they do not matter.
Similarly the best book emphasis having belief and acting on that belief. If you know Godâs will, then you must act on it! Otherwise you cannot say you know God and his commandments yet you are still indulging in fornication, adultery, theft, false accusations and witness etc. Works justifies and proves that one has belief as James wrote. Without works we cannot proof that we have faith.
Once the student is ready, a teacher will appear. We are very lucky these days that teachers (advisors and mentors) can appear from all corners of the world online and even offline to come and warn, reprimand, correct and rebuke us. Unfortunately most do not heed such good counsel and change their lives. Others end up fighting, abusing, arguing, quarrelling and banning or blocking such voices of reason. Many young people especially ladies blocked me online because of such particularly when I told them to leave their boyfriends or girlfriends who have bad characters.
If you are lucky enough to get an advisor and more so a mentor, by your efforts or mostly they took you under their mentorship, you must be a very good student especially if they are advising or mentoring you freely. People are paying huge sums of money to just get advice on how to manage their finances, live a crime free life, live in holiness and become financially independent. If you get an advisor or mentor who in most cases finances your mentorship, or simply by creating time to listen to you and advise you, count yourself one of the luckiest beings on earth. The least you can do to show appreciation is to put their advice into action, by developing good habits and behaviour.
People do not decide their future, they decide their habits and their habits decide their future. Remember our above definition of success, having few simple disciplines practiced daily. You do not need a whole year to totally transform your life, seven months of focus and hard work can put you five years ahead in life. And when your advisers and mentors see that you are putting their advice into action, they will do more. By either giving you more time for your one-on-one or and providing you with resources to aid you in your growth. But when they do not see any changes in your actions, they slowly dissociate themselves from you and become scare to you. This also applies in friendships and relationships. If your prospect sees that you are changing your bad ways, the relationship proceeds normally. But if you do not change, he or she will definitely leave you. Life is too short to stress oneself with someone who is comfortable with their vices or mediocrity.
To easily and quickly change for better, change must first start with the mindset by having a growth and benefit mindsets. Be humble, obedient to mentors, cultivate self-discipline, self-control, fortitude and mortification, daily acting towards bettering oneself little by little.
Finally, you can get all the knowledge in the world, you can have all the best advisers and mentors in the world, and you can know every word in the Bible, but if you do not act on this information positively, it is all worthless. If you claim to know Jesus Christ and you do not obey His commandments, your knowledge of Him is false, because My sheep listen to My voice and they follow and obey Me. You only prove to your advisors and mentors that you took their advice by acting on it immediately and having a positive change in your life.