Stories by J.D. Martin Rivera-Cruz

08/22/2026

https://a.co/d/09C7q292

Men Are from Mars: Toddlers Are from That Corner Chewing a Crayon

08/22/2026

https://a.co/d/04DIIYVL

Get your copy today on kindle.

Men Are from Mars: Toddlers Are from That Corner Chewing a Crayon

07/29/2026

Take a look at the preview and let me know what you honestly think! I’d love to hear your first impressions.

💬 What stands out to you?
❤️ Would you read it?
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Thank you to everyone who’s supported me along the way. Your encouragement means more than you know. The journey is just getting started… and I can’t wait to share what’s coming next! 📚🎉

07/21/2026

Every Gray Hair Has a Student’s Name

People always ask me,

“Why you got so much gray hair?”

I don’t blame age.

I blame children.

Every gray hair on my head has a first and last name.

The first one showed up after a kindergartner looked me dead in the face and asked,

“Coach… why your forehead so big?”

The second arrived when a little boy proudly announced,

“I flushed my shoe.”

“Why?”

“I wanted to see if it could swim.”

By Christmas, I was fifty shades of silver.

One afternoon I smelled smoke.

I sprinted across the gym ready to save lives.

Turns out…

A kid was rubbing two crayons together trying to “start a campfire.”

Then there was little Ava.

She walked up smiling and whispered,

“I don’t feel good.”

Before I could respond…

She threw up with the accuracy of an Olympic sprinkler.

Direct hit.

Another gray hair.

Then came dismissal.

A child handed me a chicken nugget he’d been carrying in his pocket.

“Coach… you want the rest of my lunch?”

I stared at the warm nugget.

He stared back.

I found three more gray hairs that afternoon.

People think teaching ages you.

It doesn’t.

Kids do.

My birth certificate says I’m forty-four…

…but according to my hairline, I’ve been working in elementary schools since the Civil War.

😂👨🏽‍🏫:::

07/14/2026

Back When Cooties Were a Real Disease

Kids these days will never understand the terror of cooties.

Back in elementary school, cooties weren’t a joke.

They were a medical emergency.

One recess, my friend Marcus accidentally brushed hands with a girl while reaching for the kickball.

He froze.

She froze.

Then somebody screamed…

“HE GOT COOTIES!”

Within seconds, the entire playground evacuated like a zombie outbreak had started.

Marcus started panicking.

“I didn’t mean to touch her!”

A kid grabbed a stick and drew an invisible circle around him.

“Don’t let him out!”

Another child yelled, “You gotta get the cootie shot!”

Now, if you grew up in the ’90s, you already know.

The cootie shot wasn’t medicine.

It was four punches on the arm followed by someone yelling,

“CIRCLE! CIRCLE! DOT! DOT! NOW YOU GOT YOUR COOTIE SHOT!”

Marcus stood there rubbing his arm like he’d just survived surgery.

Then the little girl looked at him, shrugged, and said,

“I don’t even like boys.”

She walked away.

Marcus smiled proudly.

“See? It worked!”

We all agreed the cootie shot had saved his life.

Looking back…

The only thing more contagious than “cooties”…

…was elementary school logic.

😂 Who else remembers giving the legendary cootie shot?

07/13/2026

The Haunted Bathroom

Everyone in my family warned me never to use the old bathroom after midnight.

“It’s haunted,” Grandma whispered.

Naturally, at 12:01, I grabbed my flashlight and marched inside.

The door slammed behind me.

The lights flickered.

A ghostly voice echoed, “Leeeeave…”

I laughed. “Nice try.”

The toilet flushed by itself.

My confidence disappeared.

Then the shower curtain slowly slid open.

Nothing.

Suddenly, a pale figure rose from the bathtub wearing a bathrobe and fuzzy slippers.

“I’m the Bathroom Ghost,” he sighed. “Could you keep it down? I’m trying to relax.”

I blinked.

“You haunt people?”

“Only on weekends,” he groaned. “The rest of the week your family keeps eating chili, and this place becomes unlivable.”

Before I could answer, another ghost floated through the mirror holding a can of air freshener.

“Frank,” she snapped, “they did taco night again!”

The Bathroom Ghost buried his face in his hands.

“I told them beans were cursed.”

I couldn’t stop laughing.

He pointed toward the door.

“Go. Please. And tell your grandmother to switch brands of hot sauce.”

As I ran away, I heard one final flush.

It wasn’t supernatural.

Grandpa had been hiding in the laundry room the whole time, laughing harder than the ghosts.

07/07/2026

The Day My Son Got Us Banned from Family Game Night

Every family has that one child.

The one who wakes up and chooses violence.

Ours is six-year-old Isaiah.

Family Game Night started innocent enough.

Uno.

Pizza.

Laughter.

Then Aunt Brenda played a Draw Four.

Isaiah looked her dead in the eyes and said,

“You cheating.”

She laughed.

“No, baby.”

He nodded slowly.

“Okay.”

Five minutes later, the room got quiet.

Isaiah disappeared.

When he came back, he was carrying Aunt Brenda’s purse.

He reached inside, pulled out her reading glasses, her lipstick…

…and a bag of sugar-free gummy bears.

He held them up like evidence in court.

“So YOU the one that keeps everybody in the bathroom.”

The room exploded.

My uncle fell out of his chair laughing.

My cousin spit sweet tea across the table.

Aunt Brenda turned fifty shades of embarrassed.

She snatched the bag.

“Give me those!”

Isaiah wasn’t finished.

He pointed at Grandpa.

“And you…”

Grandpa froze.

“You been pretending to lose at Uno for years. I saw you hiding Wild Cards under your leg.”

Grandpa slowly pulled two Wild Cards out from under his thigh.

“I don’t appreciate little snitches.”

Isaiah smiled.

“I don’t appreciate little cheaters.”

Family Game Night was officially canceled…

Until next Friday.

😂😂😂

07/03/2026

Grandpa’s Funeral Was Going Perfectly… Until He Sneezed

My grandpa had one request before he died.

“I don’t want a sad funeral.”

We promised.

The church was packed.

People laughed through stories about Grandpa accidentally setting the grill on fire, arguing with GPS directions, and insisting every ache could be cured with Vicks VapoRub.

Even the preacher was smiling.

Then it happened.

From the front row, my grandpa sneezed.

Loud.

Grandma gasped.

“Oh Lord…”

The entire room froze.

She slowly stood up, pointed at the casket, and whispered,

“That sounded just like Harold.”

Before anyone could respond…

A sneeze echoed through the chapel.

People screamed.

Someone dropped the potato salad.

My uncle dove behind the piano.

The preacher nearly baptized himself.

Then…

Another sneeze.

Everyone stared at the casket.

The funeral director walked over, opened the lid…

…and pulled out Grandpa’s old hunting dog.

The stubborn old beagle had crawled into the casket during the visitation the night before and slept there through the entire service.

The church fell silent.

Then Grandma laughed so hard she had tears in her eyes.

“I knew your granddaddy wasn’t finished making us laugh.”

Honestly…

It was exactly the funeral Grandpa would’ve wanted.

😂🐶 Please like and share. Thank you all for reading.

07/03/2026

The Face in the Hallway

When I bought my house, the previous owner gave me one piece of advice.

“If you wake up after 3:00 a.m.,” he said, “don’t look down the hallway.”

I laughed.

He didn’t.

For months, nothing happened.

Then one night I woke up thirsty.

The clock read 3:07 a.m.

As I stepped into my bedroom doorway, I remembered his warning.

Don’t look down the hallway.

I almost listened.

Almost.

At the far end of the hall stood a woman.

Barefoot.

Wearing a white nightgown.

Her face hidden behind long black hair.

She wasn’t moving.

She wasn’t breathing.

She was just… waiting.

I slammed my bedroom door and stayed there until sunrise.

The next morning, the hallway was empty.

I convinced myself I’d imagined it.

The following night, I woke again.

3:07 a.m.

This time I never left my bed.

Then I heard it.

Slow footsteps.

Not in the hallway.

In my bedroom.

I pulled the blanket over my head like a frightened child.

A cold breath brushed against my ear.

Then a woman’s voice whispered…

“You weren’t supposed to look.”

When I finally gathered the courage to peek…

The hallway was empty.

But my bedroom door…

…was standing wide open.

👀 What would you do next?

07/01/2026

The Man Who Kept Ordering Two Coffees

Every Saturday at 9:00 a.m., a man walked into the same coffee shop and ordered two coffees.

He always sat by the window.

One cup stayed untouched.

For nearly a year, no one asked why.

Until the new barista finally smiled and said, “You know… your friend never shows up.”

He smiled back.

“He did once.”

She apologized, embarrassed.

He shook his head.

“It’s okay.”

A few minutes later, another man walked in carrying a stack of books.

He looked around the café, spotted the empty chair, and laughed.

“You’re still ordering two coffees?”

“I promised I always would.”

The barista watched as they hugged.

She later learned the story.

On their very first date, twenty years earlier, the second man had been so nervous he never showed up.

Instead of leaving angry, the first man ordered a second coffee anyway.

The following Saturday, he came back.

So did the other man.

They’d been together ever since.

Now, every Saturday, they still ordered two coffees.

Not because one might not come.

But because they never wanted to forget the day love gave them a second chance.

❤️ Sometimes the best relationships don’t begin with perfect timing—they begin with someone willing to wait.